Beach Bum or Snow Bunny?

Halloween

Tiny Adult

Potty training. Check. (Big girl underpants all day, every day. Woo hoo!)

Literacy. Check. (Can write an "H." Can recognize "M" and "D.")

Driving. Check. (Helps me park the car at home.)

Ornery when doesn't get nap. (Same as me.)

Doesn't like to clean up messes. (Ditto.)

Makes powerful and convincing arguments about why things should be done her way. (Future attorney?)

It is very challenging to maintain parental authority, credibility, and control with a 2 year old who thinks she is an adult. Fortunately, she is such a good-natured fun-loving kid that the terrible twos are really not so terrible after all. While there are fleeting moments of terrible-ness, they are far outweighed by delight. If I can get her on film showing off her dancing moves, you will see what I mean.

The Whopper

Hana told her first full-fledged, pre-meditated, manipulative lie this past Sunday as we were driving home from Tahoe.

It all began with predictable whining about wanting to get out of the car. After all, it is a long drive, and it's no fun being stuck in the car seat all that time. About 20 minutes from home, she notified us that she needed to go potty. I told her it was OK to go in her diaper and that we weren't near a potty. The next 5 minutes went something like this:

H: I need to poop.
Me: OK, you can go in your diaper.
H: [grunt, grunt, grunt] I pooped. I need a change.
Me: Hmmmm, Pete, what do you think? Can we make it home or should we stop and change her?
H: I need a change!!!!!
Me: OK, guess we should stop.
H: Mommy, do you have a plastic bag for the poopy diaper?
Me: Not sure, I'll have to check.
H: [As we are pulling into a gas station, Hana sprouted a giant grin] Actually, I didn't poop.

She knows that when she poops she needs to be changed right away, and she used that to get us to let her out of the car!!! The whole diaper thing has now become her ticket to get what she wants. She uses it at night - holds it until after I've put her to bed, then poops, then I have to get her out and change her. Last night she even took off her diaper in her crib so I would have to come in and deal with it.

Sheesh!

On another note, we had a wonderful first camping experience in the preschool back yard. Here are some photos.

Toddler Heaven

What more could a toddler want than to meet Curious George and get her face painted like Spiderman all in one weekend?

Last Friday evening, we all went to the Bay Area Discovery Museum (thanks for the membership Grandma and Grandpa Geckeler!) for a special event - meeting Curious George. Actually, the main event was a musical performance, but obviously the highlight of the evening was meeting George. The museum was well-prepared for the stir his appearance caused. George had his own bodyguard/handler that kept him safe and moved him along through the throngs of groping toddlers and hoards of parents with cameras. Hana was quite excited to meet him, although a bit nervous about getting too up close and personal without one of us right by her side. She did give him a high five though.

Then on Saturday it was "Kids Fun Day" at her preschool, where she got her face painted. Despite the best efforts of the (ahem) "traditional" volunteer parent who tried to steer her towards a princess or a butterfly design, she picked the Spiderman face out of the book of pictures. So that's what she got. I was a little worried she might be scared when she saw herself in the mirror, but she took it all in good stride. She had a nap afterwards and when she woke up, she said "Mommy, want to see the Spiderman all over the crib?" The paint was all over her sheets.

On another note, Hana has developed a serious case of the "why's." No response is ever sufficient explanation. Tonight I was patting her belly to help her go to sleep and I stopped and she said, "Mommy, why did you stop?" I said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, it was an accident." The response: "But mommy, why did you stop though?" After several fruitless attempts to claim it was an accident, I finally said, "Because Mommy's brain wandered and thought of something else and forgot to tell her hand to keep patting you" to which she responded "Oh."

Role Reversal

Hana: I'm drinking soda [or coffee].

Me: That's only for grown-ups. Are you a grown-up?

Hana: Yes.

Me: Can I have some?

Hana: No, you're not a grown-up!!!

Abracadabra

"Abracadabra, I'm going to turn you into a cat!"

This is a new favorite game. Turning me into a cat (or a dog), then asking me to turn her into a cat (or a dog). In general, she is very into pretending to be someone or something else. Sometimes she is a baby and likes to be carried and rocked and pretends to nurse. Sometimes she is a mommy to her dolls and stuffed animals. And when she's pretending to be a dog, we play "fetch" and she brings the ball back in her mouth. :)

Potty training is going well. I must say, though, that the term "potty training" implies that the parent is doing something to train the child to use the bathroom, as if there is some sort of methodology. As it turns out, just about everything I've read is completely contradictory to that. In fact, the child is actually the one in charge, and any pushing by the parent before the child is ready is bound to be counterproductive. Hana is on her own timetable and process for this one. She's got all the skills and awareness necessary to use the potty, but motivation has been intermittent.

Today, we had a break though, which I attribute to what was probably a lot of healthy peer pressure to use the potty at preschool this week. She ran around the house after her bath for 3 hours naked today, and spontaneously used the potty three times during that period!! Two of those times, she insisted on doing the whole thing completely on her own, and wouldn't even let me in the bathroom. I could hear her going through all the steps - peeing, wiping, dumping it in the big potty, flushing the toilet, putting the lid down, and washing and drying her hands. She was very proud of herself for doing the whole process from start to finish.

Sleeping in the big girl bed, on the other hand, is pretty much on hold. We still have the pack n play, so that's her night time home for now.

Born to Go To School

Hana started preschool this week. She absolutely LOVES it and we couldn't be more thrilled with the school. The facility is fabulous, the teachers are wonderful, and there is a strong parent/family community. The teachers and director have all said that Hana is adjusting perfectly to the new environs - she's outgoing, participatory, energetic without being domineering, friendly with the other kids, and a general pleasure all around.

She is already learning new things. Today she showed off her new vocabulary word - "germs." :) When I went to change her diaper this evening, she asked me if I had gloves. I didn't know what she meant, but said yes, figuring she was referring to winter gloves, since that's the only kind of gloves she knows. Then she told me I had to wear them while changing her diaper so we don't share germs. (I told her since we are family it's OK to share a little bit of germs, but if you are not family you should try not to share germs.)

Also, she made "apple pie" today (apple muffins) with the organic apples from the tree in the yard. She's fed celery to the goats, and dressed up like a zebra. She's played in the sandbox, read books, sang songs, napped on her monkey mat, and lots of things I'm sure I don't even know about. It's toddler heaven.

Hana Is Starting Preschool

A surprise twist in Hana's day to day life - she will be starting preschool next week! We had been casually exploring preschools, without much hope for this year since slots fill up 6 months to a year here in the Bay Area. I had pretty much given up hope and was resigned to waiting until next year, when we found a great place that was affordable, flexible, a great environment, and they had openings in their "Sprouts" classroom (2 year olds).

Hana will get to play inside and out, have singing and reading during circle time, tend the garden, explore the "forest" (a small collection of fruit trees and vines), enjoy healthy organic snacks, and feed and care for the farm animals - 5 chickens and 2 pygmy goats - that live at the school. She hasn't been to visit yet, but we are pretty sure she will love it there. The teachers are very nurturing and patient and there is a strong parent community as well. It's hard to see what the downside is, except...

Hana will have to give up her nanny. This makes us very sad, because Hana just adores her and she loves Hana. Hana will still see her for another month as she transitions to school, so there will be time to say goodbye. Even though she is sad too, the nanny agrees Hana should go to school because she really needs more of a learning environment.

Tuesday will be her first day. Pete and I will stay with her for an hour or two and then will leave and we'll see how it goes.

Big Girl Bed!

Tonight is the second night Hana has actually slept in her big girl bed! We've been trying for about a month, but it hasn't taken. She'll start out there, but as soon as I leave the room, she's out of bed asking for me to come back and cuddle. Then I'd put her (over strong objections) in the crib and she'd pass out right away.

Last night and tonight, she employed her usual procrastination techniques and begged me to stay and cuddle, but ultimately ended up staying in the bed and falling asleep. Perhaps it has something to do with the magic sparkly fairies that I promised would come if she closed her eyes and went to sleep. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that her 2 year molars are just about completely in and the teething pain has resolved. Perhaps it is just maturity. Or maybe she somehow knows we have to give the crib back to Izzy this weekend and she figured it's time. Whatever the reason, we are very proud of her for being so brave and sleeping in the bed all by herself!

Hana Is Finally 2!!

Hana had a packed, fun-filled birthday week. It inadvertently began last weekend, at our friend Andrew's birthday at the Tilden Park merry-go-round. All week, Hana has been saying it was her birthday party. Then, we spent 3 days in Tahoe with Grandma Sharon and Papa Don, and finished off the mini-vacation with a chocolate birthday cupcake. The presents have been coming all week - a tool box from the Coan grandparents, some cool games from the Geckeler grandparents, and a wonderful book from her friend Hudson on the east coast.

Today was her official birthday party (a few pics of the day above). The day began with soccer class, followed by the party with several toddlers and adults and lots of grabbing and shouting of "mine!" Then a much needed nap (she fell asleep in the car while holding her balloon), followed by a swim in the pool. She had such a great day! She even blew out the candles on her cake all by herself.

One of the most exciting things that happened this weekend was that Hana's friend Izzy got a new little sister named Millie, on Hana's birthday!!! So now Hana has a birthday buddy.

Happy fathers' day to Pete and all the dads out there!

Preschool?

We went on our first preschool visit today to a local Montessori. We really liked it! There was music in the classrooms, it was very spacious, most of the kids seemed engaged and enjoying themselves. They have Spanish lessons once a week, and they do phonics and math as soon as the kids seem ready. The classrooms are mixed age from 2-5, and a lot of the learning is peer-based with the older kids teaching the younger kids how to do things. Unfortunately, sending a child to a full time Montessori program in the Bay Area costs about the same as a Harvard education. We have several other schools to look at before we make any decisions, so we'll see.

Hana is also going to soccer class this summer. The first class was last Sunday and she did fabulously! She listened to the coach, followed all the instructions, actively participated in all the games, and pretty much put the other kids to shame. If I can get her on video, I'll post it here.

We are still struggling with various forms of physical assault from time to time - biting, scratching, grabbing, and my favorite - grabbing fistfuls of my hair and refusing to let go. It seems to happen when she is already wound up, and she is usually wound up in the early evening. Time outs don't work anymore. The nanny says she now just gives her a tight hug that physically prevents her from biting and explains "no biting." Tonight I was able to catch her right before she did it and talk her down, and then she calmed down and was very sweet the rest of the evening. Trial and error, trial and error. Fortunately, this is something she mostly does to me, sometimes to Pete, sometimes to other people she knows well, but not to strangers or other kids she doesn't know well. In other words, she's not indiscriminately aggressive. I think there is something about "feeling safe" to act out with people she knows. She somehow instinctively gets that we are not going to leave her.

Promising Career Options: Naked Chef, Cinematographer, or Tech Support

The Procrastimaster

No, this is not a new piece of exercise equipment.

It's Hana's new nickname. And it is well-earned! I have never seen a human being master the art of procrastination with such subtlety and grace that you don't even notice it happening until it's too late and you are caught in its web.

New bedtime procrastination strategies include the following:

1) The Blanket Switch Up Routine. "No I want the other blanket. No the other one. No not that one, the green one! Mommy, can you get the blanket that's in the living room?"

2) The 'Drown Me in Milk' Approach. This involves drinking all her milk and asking for more. And more. And more.

3) Kiss Me, Hug Me. This one is the most mischievous and manipulative, because who can say no to a sweet request for a kiss or a hug?

4) Stories, Stories, Stories. We can no longer just read a story. Each page is accompanied by all kinds of questions and commentary. "Mommy why is the baby crying? Is the mommy going to pick the baby up? I think the baby's sad. She's crying. What's that (pointing to something)? What's that? What's that? Is that the baby's bed?" And on, and on, and on.

5) Just One More. This is the strategy of last resort and applies to #1-4 above. Just one more book, one more kiss, one more hug, one more whatever. Often it's a clearly desperate attempt to come up with just one more thing she can do to avoid bed - turn out the light, put the baby in the chair, put the shirt in the laundry, brush her teeth again - whatever last straw she can grasp at, she'll go for it. This one is the most insidious because while you are in the process of saying no, and explaining why, she's already moved on to 'just one more' of something else, and before you know it, you've been doing that for 5 minutes - Hana asking for 'just one more X' and you saying 'no, not tonight, sweetie, it's night night time' over and over.

We love our little procrastimaster!

Baby or Kid?

Hana is experiencing some ambivalence about her impending birthday. She is very excited that she is going to "turn into a kid" in less than 2 months. At the same time, she is clinging to babyhood, as evidenced by the fact that she has begun to refer to herself in the third person as "The Baby," as in
"Pick The Baby up" and "The Baby wants some milk." In the car today, she made up her own Wheels on the Bus verse:

The Hana Baby says pick me up, pick me up, pick me up...

I have read about this ambivalence, and of course it's normal for kids to "regress" at times, but I never thought it would be quite so literal.

On another note, I am pleased to report that Hana did not inherit my terrible sense of direction. She now points and tells me which way to go when I am driving someplace, or instructs me to go up or down a hill, and she's always right. The other day while backseat driving she said, "Mommy, I'm helping you to go 'whee' [that's one of her words for driving] because I don't want you to get lost." She also knows the difference between red and green traffic lights and tells me when to stop and go.

Tomorrow we are going to try a morning of arts and crafts - pipe cleaners, sequins, homemade play doh, markers (washable), colored paper, glue, egg crates, etc. Check back here for pics of any masterpieces that Hana cooks up.

Easter Movies

Easter Trip to SoCal

Hana made the prettiest easter egg of all! (see last pic) She dipped it and rolled it around in 3 or 4 different colors and it came out with all different shades of blues and reds, perfectly blended.

Thank You Grandma!

No Nap Hana

Picture this - walking down Piedmont Avenue, me carrying screaming Hana, who has fistfuls of my hair and is clawing my face and trying to bite me, and I'm screaming back "Ow, Hana STOP IT!!!!" and trying to pull her hands out of my hair while carrying my purse and her new bicycle helmet. (I'm only carrying her because just seconds earlier she refused to hold me hand and bolted into the street.) All the other families with nice calm children are staring at us like we are lunatics.

We did make it back to the car, barely. We got home, she dashed out of the car, and fell and skinned both her knees. HOWLED bloody murder. We went upstairs, I gave her some milk, and she went straight to bed. Haven't heard a peep.

Lesson learned: No matter what, Hana MUST have a nap.

Language Explosion

Hana's development always seems to occur in these periodic bursts - and she's done it again. It's hard to characterize, but something has happened with her language development in the last couple of days. It's something about her ability to translate abstract concepts into sophisticated and grammatically correct sentences. This morning when I got her from her crib, I asked her if she wanted me to take her shirt off. She said, quite clearly, "Don't take my shirt off. I will be naked if you do that." School got cancelled today, and Pete told her it was cancelled because the teacher was sick. This evening she said to me, "I didn't have school today. Daddy told me the teacher was sick. That's too bad."

She's such an orator, maybe she'll be president! (You heard it here first.)

Funny Conversations

Me (combing her hair in the tub): I'll be gentle, I promise.
Hana: NO THANK YOU MOMMY! I'm going to take that away from you. (grabs comb)

Hana: I'm calling Penny. (her nanny share friend) (picks up disney phone)
Hana: Hello Penny? How you doing? I'm doing very well. Bye bye!

Me (while reading "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs"): And here the grandpa is telling Henry and his sister the story.
Hana: Where's the book? (grandpa is not holding a book)
Me: Grandpa is telling the story from his head.
Hana: And from his finger. (in the picture, grandpa is pointing his finger)

Recent Pics

It's impossible to get her to stand still for a photo these days, so mostly it's the back or side of her head...

The Beauty of "No"

Hana has entered the "no" phase vibrantly and with great seriousness and purpose. A verbal "no" just simply won't do. Nor is the rebellion reserved only for situations in which there is truly reason to rebel (such as putting on a diaper - life in diapers can't be very much fun, so I understand the resistance there). The opposition is fierce, physical, and universal to pretty much anything I suggest.

I have developed multiple strategies for fostering Hana's newly discovered independence, while also keeping things generally within the boundaries of what constitutes respectable behavior for an almost 2-year-old. They don't always work, nor do I always apply them with consistency. What can I say? I'm not perfect, and it's exhausting! Sometimes, when I'm just plain *done*, I resort to shameless bribery with things I never thought I would offer as rewards for positive behaviors - TV (in the form of youtube) and ice cream. Beaker from the Muppets singing Ode to Joy (which she calls the "mi mi mi" video) and Gonzo leading a chorus of chickens (which she calls the "bok bok" video) are two all-time favorites.

Despite the daily power struggles, it is fascinating and rewarding to see Hana's personality continue to evolve and express itself. She throws herself wholeheartedly into the moment if something tickles her fancy, and then with the blink of an eye, she's on to the next thing. She is firmly committed to learning exactly how the world works, if for no other reason than she can then try to turn it upside down. I've been teaching her that "The street is only for cars. The sidewalk is for people." I know she understands this and she can explain it back to me in her own words. Now that she comprehends that this is how things work, it serves as a springboard for dashing off into the street in defiance of the rules. (Fortunately, the "street" is the cul de sac near my building, so it's not dangerous.) She knows that food stays on the plate and that she needs to sit or kneel while she eats, and therefore in her eyes this is grounds for running amok with food in mouth and ensuring that food is evenly distributed within a 2-foot radius around the plate. She is an experimenter, an entrepreneur, and a comedian all in one.

Then there is this other side of her that is oh so sweet. She is incredibly empathetic and concerned when someone else is sad or hurt. Even when she is in her "no" mood and I am therefore unable to get a hug and a kiss from her, if I say "Mommy is sad" she'll come running over and give me a big hug and sometimes ask "You OK Mommy?" or "Feel better Mommy?" She's utterly polite, with her bless yous, pleases, sorries, and thank yous, and on occasion "thank you very much."

On another note, Hana started "pre" pre-school today - a toddler program at a local preschool. Pete took her this afternoon and the report was she LOVED it. Had an absolute blast. She was so wound up and excited by it that she had trouble falling asleep tonight. Next step: researching actual preschools to start sometime in the next year.

"I'm Not Special"

It's been a long time since I've posted. Hana is doing just fantastic. She is turning into a kind, loving, intelligent, mischievous, curious little person! Every day she continues to amaze me with her ability to understand complex things, the stories she tells (some true, some not), and her ever-evolving imagination.

Two nights ago we had a conversation that left me in stitches:

Me: You're special.

H: No I'm not.

Me: You're not? I think you're special.

H: No mommy!

M: Yes, you are, you're special.

H: I'm not special mommy, I'm Hana!!!!!!

2011 Has Begun

Hana is just rockin' these days. She is quite the comedian. We spent a little over a week in Tahoe with my parents and she was busy busy busy - running, moving things from place to place, showing off with the shape sorter, up and down the stairs, nearly pulling a whole plate of chocolate chip cookies off the counter, sitting in the kitchen window watching the sledders, standing on the kitchen counter and washing the window and cabinets with the sponge, insisting to go "round and round on the computer" (i.e., play the iPad app Wheels on the Bus), draggin grandma and grandpa into her new play tent with her, and just generally hamming it up.

She also developed an addiction to snow. Not so much playing it, though. More like eating it. She must have had a dozen snow snacks while we were there. A snow snack is a plate full of snow, which she would sit quietly in her high chair and eat. Sometimes she would go through three helpings. It was the only respite any of us got from her constant activity.

The funniest story from the week was her reaction to a waitress dropping a tray of water glasses at the diner we had dinner at one evening. After it happened, we explained that it was an accident and that the waitress had dropped the tray, the glass broke, the water spilled, then the man came with a broom and swept up the glass, then he brought a mop and cleaned up the water and it was all fixed. This became Hana's favorite story for the next 48 hours. First, on the way home from the diner, she was tired and cranky and completely fixated on "the man" in the story. "I want to go see man!" she wailed all the way home. The next day, she kept asking, "What happened the water?" And we would tell the story again. Then 5 minutes later, "What happened the water? Where's man?" And so went the day. Needless to say, the story was slightly embellished by the time she stopped asking - the water was everywhere, all over the restaurant, it made a big explosion when it fell, etc.

Last but not least, a big shout out to not-so-baby girl Hana for giving us the loveliest new year's gift ever by sleeping until nearly 8:00 am on new year's day. Ahhhhhhh. If only that could happen every day.

Lots of pictures to post - will get to that one day soon.